remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
You work out of a Hotel?
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Randomize
