Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
