He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
It's never too late to be topless.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
