You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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