what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
50% drunk capacity currently
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
A+ Viking dick
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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