what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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