mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
