So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
