Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
