I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Randomize