dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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