So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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