i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
