so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Randomize