this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I just googled if crying burns calories
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
MIDGETS
????
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Randomize
