we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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