please come you make the beer taste better
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
wow bdsm is so cute
what the fuck happened to the tacos
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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