I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
