I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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