I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
