Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize
