Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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