Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Randomize
