let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
