"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
