She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
