if i died would you start the facebook group?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
