Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
