i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
