I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
