and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Randomize
