We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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