who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
