if you like me you must not know who I am
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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