ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
