Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize