i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
