Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
