ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
