Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize