i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize