Hey man sorry I got all grabby
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
