I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
