my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
