How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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