Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
