How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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