Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
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