At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I just want to make out with him forever
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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