you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
